What a weird title for a blog post…
I had a birthday, the other day.
Have you ever noticed that when you say ‘the other day’ the time span could actually be anywhere between yesterday and the day you were born?!
So anyway, I had a birthday a few weeks ago and as I am plundering further into my twenties I thought: what better time than now to reflect on some of the important lessons I have learned? And alsooo share them with you (obviously)
I wasn’t sure whether to make this a list or an essay (lol) My fear was that if I started a list I would run out of things very quickly and realise that: maybe, I haven’t learnt anything at all and an essay just reminds me of school, and I do NOT want this to feel like homework (lolzies)
So what I am gonna do is just write, and see where this goes! Wish me luck, and hopefully you learn something along the way, like I did.
First of all, when I was in my teens I genuinely thought I was a grown up, like I legit thought I knew everything and that I was ready to take on the big bad world with myself and my under-developed titties. OBVIOUSLY now I know that I KNEW NOTHING!
So I write this with a teeny tiny pinch of salt, because I have a sneaking feeling that when I am in my 30’s I will stumble across this and cringe at my naivety, and think ‘I KNEW NOTHING’
But thats the beauty in life right? Hindsight is 20-20, and we are constantly learning. I take comfort in the knowledge that
My aunt told me that I have learnt this lesson early, which is a vibe because it is maybe one of the most significant (in this post anyway)
I know that I am not defined by what people think of me, or interestingly what I think of myself! (Let me explain)
My opinion of myself is forever changing, somedays I am the most beautiful and capable being on this planet and others I am a slug. I have learned to not always trust that.
And the same goes for other peoples opinions, firstly people can be your biggest fan today and pull the trigger tomorrow! So if you spend your time trying to please everyone you’ll be left with nothing.
I now know that I can do anything I want, now this isn’t necessarily something that I have only learnt in the last few years but it is something that I have come to realise as undeniably true.
When I was a kid in primary school I remember we had this assembly and we were asked what we wanted to be when we grew up, I said I wanted to be THE TOOTH FAIRY (I was obsessed with money and teeth)
Now I can assure you I know that being the tooth fairy is physically impossible but there is something so magical about a child’s mind and the way it has no boundaries and this is something we all need to readopt as adults. School and jobs and the necessity to eat/ pay bills kinda makes you feel like you need to be more realistic with your goals, but with HARD WORK you can do anything you want, this I guarantee.
Besides if you don’t reach for the stars then the sky would be empty. (OI I THINK I JUST MADE THAT UP)
Now this may sound like a no brainer but I am gonna throw it out there anyway, are you ready?
You can choose your friends!
I know what you are thinking: well yes Yinka, clearly.
But hear me out please?
Ever since Drake started singing about No New Friends I think some of us have taken it a bit far.
A lot of the time loyalty and the fact that you may have known someone since the sandbox can cloud your vision and you may not see that sometimes friendship runs its course.
I am constantly ridiculed by my siblings (there are 6 of them so it is harsh) for having 3 friends. But that is because I know that quality over quantity is a real thing!
And learning to let go of ‘friends’ who bring negativity into your life, or who don’t celebrate your wins is a good thing, no matter how long you’ve know them.
I think I will make this my last lesson, not that I am done or anything but I could go on about this all day and I think I will spare you that, you have come this far!
I think that learning to relax is something that comes a lot easier to some than others. I am the kind of person who wants everything done yesterday, and I can get quite stressed if things aren’t going to plan. However when you are doing something for the long-term gain you need to know how to allow things to progress and work themselves out naturally and this takes time, and with this time you have to relax.
Also more than that, I think it is necessary to know that sometimes things really are out of your control so I say it again; you need to relaaaax.
Take holidays, take breaks, binge watch TOWIE on Netflix because there is no point in stressing yourself to the point where you can’t appreciate the rewards.
What is crazy, is that I could actually go on. But I realise that this post became quite lengthy lol.
I think it is safe to say that I didn’t become the tooth fairy (or maybe I did, to be honest we are sworn to secrecy so I’m breaking an oath even now)
But yes, there you have it. Let me know if you also have any lessons you’d like to share in the comments!